Fear & Difficult People - Season 1 Ep. 8
On this episode I cover fear and how to reduce it around dealing with difficult people.
I use the "Pink Bow Technique" which is a powerful tool that can be used to manage difficult people and their negative energy. I developed this technique utilising visualisation and disassociation to help individuals protect themselves from the negative energy exuded by difficult people, while also remaining emotionally regulated.
When a difficult person approaches, the first step is to imagine putting out your hands to catch and hold the negative energy that they exude. This visualisation serves as a reminder that you have the power to control your own emotions and that you do not have to allow other people's negative energy to affect you or wash over you and consume you.
As the person speaks and offloads their negative energy, it is important to remain detached and observe without becoming emotionally involved. Imagine holding onto that negative energy, but not allowing it to consume you. This allows you to remain emotionally regulated and avoid getting into a state of fear or anxiety.
Once the person has finished speaking, imagine wrapping up their negative energy in nice wrapping paper and putting a big pink bow on it. This visualisation serves as a reminder that you have taken control of the situation and that you are giving back the negative energy to the person, rather than allowing it to consume you.
It is important to remember that the "Pink Bow Technique" is a tool to help manage difficult people and their negative energy, but it does not mean that we have to condone their behaviour. Once emotions have settled down, and if it is appropriate to approach the person, communication in a clear and assertive manner may help the relationship
When communicating, it is important to come from a place of understanding your own feelings and the impact that the person's behaviour had on you. Instead of blaming or accusing, express your feelings and the effect that the behaviour had on you in a calm and non-confrontational way. For example, "When you did that, I felt disrespected, upset, not valued and I am not happy about it’.
By communicating in this way, you are setting boundaries and making it clear that you will not be happy to tolerate negative behaviour. It is important to remember that setting boundaries is not an attack on the person, it is a way to take care of yourself and create a positive environment for everyone involved.
Additionally, it is important to remember that not all difficult people respond to communication, some may continue with their behaviour and in those cases, it may be necessary to seek support from a supervisor, HR or a therapist.
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