Reducing Fear Part 2 - Season 1 Ep. 6

Season #1

How to Reduce Fear in Relation to Our Problems 

This week we are chatting about how to manage fear in relation to our problems. The first step is to explain the concept of Association and Disassociation as I use this in the technique I teach you later in the episode.  

When it comes to managing our emotions, one powerful tool we have at our disposal is the ability to disassociate or associate into the pictures we hold in our minds. 

Disassociation refers to the process of separating ourselves from the images in our heads that are causing us distress. By doing this, we can distance ourselves from the negative emotions associated with those pictures, which in turn can help to diminish the intensity of those feelings. For example, if you have a traumatic memory that continues to cause you anxiety or fear, disassociating from that memory by visualising yourself as a detached observer, rather than as the person experiencing the trauma, can help to reduce the emotional impact of the memory. 

On the other hand, association refers to the process of connecting ourselves to the thoughts, images, and memories that make us feel good. By doing this, we can strengthen the positive emotions associated with those pictures, which in turn can help to increase the intensity of those feelings. For example, if you have a happy memory that makes you feel good, associating with that memory by visualizing yourself as the person experiencing the happy event, rather than as a detached observer, can help to amplify the positive feelings associated with the memory. 

It is important to note that both disassociation and association are normal and natural processes that occur in the mind. However, when used intentionally and skilfully, they can be powerful tools for managing our emotions and improving our overall well-being. 

The "Problem, Not the Person" technique is a technique I developed that uses association and disassociation to help individuals separate their problems from their sense of self. 

The technique is based on the idea that when we have a problem, it can be easy to become absorbed in it and start to identify ourselves with it. This can lead to negative thoughts and emotions such as self-doubt, guilt, and shame. The "Problem, Not the Person" technique helps to separate the problem from the person by teaching individuals to disassociate from their problems as this reduces the fear related to the problem. Next the person can see that the size of the problem is smaller than they thought in relation to the vastness of space where their problem doesn’t exist in. When we have achieved this we can search for solutions to the problem in that space outside the problem or ‘the not problem’. Solutions only exist outside the problem and in the history of mankind there have been thousands if not millions of people who have found solutions to your problem. As well as that we have access to so many answers by using the internet so there is a very high chance that we can all find solutions to most if not all of our problems. Knowing this further reduces the fear related to any problems. 

To use this technique, individuals are first asked to identify a problem that they are facing. Next, they are asked to think about the problem as if it were a separate entity from themselves and to move it out in front of them.  

Once the problem is imagined as separate from the self, the person is then disassociated from looking at the problem from a distance. As they do this, they can start to notice the problem's characteristics, such as its size, shape etc. By disassociating from the problem, they can start to see it as something that can be managed or solved, rather than something that defines who they are. 

After disassociating from the problem and the fear is reduced it is easier to then investigate where the solutions exist which is in the not problem. Then we recognise the solution and decide what action we are going to take to solve the problem. 

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